My work from draft one to the final draft underwent many changes, and I believe it displays me using learning outcome one to its full potential in paper 3. To revise my paper, I participated in peer review and also got feedback from our class writing fellow, Vic. The first draft was really just the beginning to the introduction and lacked a lot of structure. There was no thesis included here. The changes really started to take shape in drafts 2 and 3. In draft 2, the introduction was finished and a very rough version of the thesis was created. The beginning of a body paragraph was developed. Draft 3 was where I changed the thesis, it previously didn’t capture what my paper was trying to say. I thought it was important to include “I learned” in the thesis because that was the purpose of the paper. The body paragraphs were also added onto. From this draft to the final draft is where things started to really come together, I could really collect my thoughts and get them on the paper. I split paragraphs up so that they stayed to the point and didn’t get too long. This is shown in the second paragraph, which I ended up creating into two paragraphs. I also did this with my first body paragraph which actually made what I was trying to say much more clear and it was stronger afterwards. This goes to show that I can organize and create a paper that is efficient and easy to follow. I also added a lot more analysis, which is basically shown in all 3 body paragraphs, where I dug deep into my thoughts and thoroughly explained my thoughts more and more after each draft. I also added 2 paragraphs, one a body and one a conclusion, to really instill my voice and ideas in the reader. Those are some global revisions I made, while I also made local revisions such as changing word choice, and working on sentence flow. This paper showed my development in a variety of ways. It shows that after getting my thoughts on the paper I can really organize and bring them together after revision. For me, this paper was really where I learned to use my voice and exert this into my work. In this paper, I poured my heart into it and from my perspective this really showed. The last two paragraphs especially, I added them following peer review. I got feedback that I needed to dig deeper and analyze further, and I really improved this from the first paper to this paper. This paper showed that I can improve over time and I believe that is really significant.
